Hello Darling my one and truest!
Someone with your good looks and total lack of regard for personal safety could only be here for one reason!
You've been snubbed and let down enough, and want something better, someONE better!
You want...

The Ultimate Date!

Well look no further! I, your esteemed and lovely partner Callama, who's been waiting for this moment with baited breath, am more than happy to take you on an illustrious adventure!
I'm sure you know this already Darling, but I am legally required by the laws of Nebraska to warn you that these dates have a very high fatality rate, but honestly who could get here without knowing that?
There's no turning back now Darling!
Let's set our mood and start our meet cute!